Tuesday, September 20, 2011

I dont have a title for this post

I need to get some things out.


First let me just say that I hate my wisdom teeth and I have put it off long enough. I am in so much pain from them right now so I FINALLY (after years YES I said years) of brushing it under the rug and arguing with Chris about it I have made my appointment for next week to consult and get theses bad boys out. I am so not looking forward to this but it needs to be done. My wisdom teeth have been growing in for the last 3 years since I was 20. Wish me luck and someone give me some courage so I can just get this over with. The recovery is not going to be fun but I will extend my maternity leave another week so that will help and the Grandmas will help with Rilynn so I don't have to worry about her at all. Hopefully it wont be too difficult.

My next issue is a weight issue. I know I know everyone always says the same thing when ever I talk about how my body has changed from this pregnancy but you don't see what I see...I have about 6lbs to go until I am back to pre preg weight so that is hanging over my head I wanted to be back to normal by our anniversary and unless a miracle happens in the next week its not going to happen and I need to just except it. I still cannot fit into any of my jeans and here in Georgia its starting the get cool so that means if homeslice don't kick it into gear ill be wearing summer dresses, athletic shorts and t shirts ALL winter long :) I refuse to buy bigger jeans. All my hard earned seven jeans will be wasted I cant have this happen. I must get back into shape. I'm so critical of my body and I miss my old tight stomach without stretchies :(

Another issue that co insides with the weigh issue is my stretchmarks and stomach. I know it takes time and I need to be patient but I just want to look normal again. I have been putting stretch mark cream on religiously since birth and there has been no change. The skin also hasn't gone back its still squishy. The elastin needs to return so the skin can get tight again. I hate that I'm having all these body image issues but I cant help it. Chris can tell me I'm beautiful all day long and that my skin will go back till hes blue in the face it still doesn't change the way I'm feeling. It definitely puts me down in the dumps when I'm going out and have to try on every single piece of clothing to see if it fits the same and then end up in gym shorts and a t-shirt... sad sad day but I do know that I cant fix this and while my stomach may never look the way it did before it isn't going to look the way it does now forever. 

Enough of that...

Nothing interesting has happened this week same ole same ole. Ri is still trying to figure this whole sleeping at night thing out. I don't want to jinx myself and say she has done great the last few nights so we wont talk about that. 

Tonight is my first night alone with her since hubbs is working totally sucks but I shall survive. Wish me tons of sleep and good luck that she behaves :) nighty night!!


     

3 comments:

  1. Honeychild, I feel your pain about the body image issues! Even though I'm back down to pre preggo weight, things don't look the same. Things are wider and mushier. I hate getting dressed to go somewhere, and I've been tempted to sport the maternity jeans as a last resort! I may be hitting the gym sooner than I thought! Good luck tonight! I hope she sleeps for you!

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  2. Hey there!

    First of all, I feel you on the wisdom teeth. I am almost 27 and mine are bothering me as we speak! It is definitely best to get them out now :)
    I had to chime in about the body issues. First of all, you JUST had a baby! Don't be so hard on yourself. If I'm being honest, I was down to pre-preg weight about 8 weeks after delivery but it was almost a year before I felt "skinny" again. Your stretch marks should fade, but they probably won't go away entirely :( It sucks, but I am still carrying mine 2 1/2 years later. It took me a long time to accept that my body stomach would probably never look the same. It's the price some of us pay for our beautiful babies. Feel better soon and go easy on yourself :)

    Ashlynn
    www.cushybabyfamily.blogspot.com

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  3. I totally understand the wisdom theeth! I have to get mine out after Eric gets here..I also have been putting it off since before we were married....so over 2 years.. grrr. I have heard that the recovery is not that bad though...so try not to stress too much.
    As for body image, I have been struggling with that and I havent even had my child yet..I know that I will feel the same after he is here. I just want so bad to look and feel "normal" again. But you know what....we are mommies and it will come....we just might have to work a little bit harder than we thought. I think you look great, But I know that we are always our own worst critics. Hang in there and know that with those stretch marks, you grew an absolutely beautiful baby girl!

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